What would you do if you would discover some things about your husband ?

[glock_girl]

Hi!

I don't know if you solved your original problem with your husband...

But I will be honest, the very last person I dated before I found my husband was like this, and worse. Not only did he take a liking to his buddy's girlfriend (in a friendly manner) but I knew things were up when he wanted me to act, dress, and look like her. Talk about wierd and creepy.

Regardless, I do believe that you are not the one with the problem here if your husband doesn't have a pure soul and has to lie and / or hide things from you, than how can you foster trust in your relationship? And without trust, how can there be real love?

I think you need to set the record straight with him, and tell him exactly how you feel about it, and what you expect out of him. If he can't comply with that...then I don't know

[NatalieLemmer]

You should have waited until you knew him better before you got married.

Marriage implies that you are willing to live with that person, both positive characteristics and faults.

Marriage implies that you have trust and a committment.

It is not wise to marry someone, and then hope they fit into your mold of the perfect wife or husband.

Assume he is through with the past? Never.

A line from the movie MAGNOLIA:
"We may be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us."

Have you asked him bluntly, if he is having an affair or still interested in his ex?

P.S. It is my experience that men hardly feel guilty for what they have done (because usually a lot of forethought was involved before they acted). And if so, they will clench their teeth tight before they tell you that they feel this way. Guilt implies weakness and error.

I would ask him again why they keep in touch!

If he says, "because she was a big part of my life," then you will need to live with it or get out of the relationship.

Natasha